One Hundred Forty-Seventh Page of Text with Inscription in the 1853 H. G. Bohn Reprint, Version 2
REPENTANCE AND AMENDMENT.
her neck, and hid her face on her shoulder again; and without raising it she gave her the history of the morning.
“ What has brought about this dreadful state of things ? ” said Alice after a few minutes. “ Whose fault is it, Ellen ? ”
“ I think it is aunt Fox’tune’s fault,” said Ellen, raising her head ;
“ I don’t think it is mine. If she had behaved well to me I should have behaved well to her. I meant to, I am sure.”
“Do you mean to say you do not think you have been in fault at all in the matter ! ”
“ No, ma’am—I do not mean to say that. I have been very much in fault—very often—I know that. I get very angry and vexed, and sometimes I say nothing, but sometimes I get out of all patience and say things I ought not. I did so to-day ; but it is so very hard to keep still when I am in such a passion ;—and now I have got to feel so towards aunt Fortune that I don’t like the sight of her ; I hate the very look of her bonnet hanging up on the wall. I know it isn’t right: and it makes me miserable ; and I can’t help it, for I grow worse and worse every day ;—and what shall I do ? ”
Ellen’s tears came faster than her words.
“Ellen, my child,” said Alice after a while,—“there is but one way. You know what I said to you yesterday ? ”
“ I know it, but dear Miss Alice, in my reading this morning I came to that verse that speaks about not being forgiven if we do not forgive others ; and oh ! how it troubles me ; for I can’t feel that I forgive aunt Fortune ; I feel vexed whenever the thought of her comes into my head ; and how can I behave right to her while I feel so ? ”
“You are right there, my dear; you cannot indeed; the heart must be set right before the life can be.”
“ But what shall I do to set it right ? ”
“ Dear Miss Alice, I have been praying all this morning that I might forgive aunt Fortune, and yet I cannot do it.”
“ Pray still, my dear,” said Alice, pressing her closer in her arms, —“pray still; if you are in earnest the answer will come. But there is something else you can do, and must do, Ellen, besides praying, or praying may be in vain.”
“ What do you mean, Miss Alice ? ”
“You acknowledge yourself in fault—have you made all the amends you can ? Have you, as soon as you have seen yourself in the wrong, gone to your aunt Fortune and acknowledged it, and humbly asked her pardon ? ”
Ellen answered “ no ” in a low voice.
“ Then, my child, your duty is plain before you. The next thing after doing wrong is to make all the amends in your power; confess your fault, and ask forgiveness, both of God and man. Pride struggles against it,—I see yours does,—but my child,"God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.'"
York Street, London
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